it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
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