whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
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