gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
