I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Randomize
