He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
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