it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
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