wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
