After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
