So called my VP's house on Sunday drunk and told him that if he didn't hire me for the new position I would skull fuck his wife. They asked me to go home today. Thanks again Vodka
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
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