bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
Randomize