My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
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