i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
