IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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