oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
Randomize
