Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
As shirtless as possible
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
Randomize
