I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Randomize
