the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
Randomize
