sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
