Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Randomize