he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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