The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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