Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize