he shaved USA in his pubs
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
