do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
