Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
Randomize
