hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
we're making bets on your personal life
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Randomize
