and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
