This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
