I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
Can I color on your dick again?
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
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