i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
