come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Randomize
