dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Randomize
