i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
