I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Randomize
