i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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