She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Randomize
