Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
Randomize