Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
