we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
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