Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
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