sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
