Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Randomize
