Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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