Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
Randomize