IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
Randomize
