This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Randomize
