nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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