is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
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