The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Randomize