Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
